Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
I just totok an inventory of my purse: 1 apple, 1 pair of underwear, 7 condoms, $18 in ones, a check with "for sexual healing" in the subject line, and a 4 oz bottle of wine.
Oh! and a letter from a judge saying I got an interview. Cause that balances it out.
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
Apparently asking your girlfriends roommate for a hand job when u craw into the wrong bed after a bottle of rum is "bad form".
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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