She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
NEVER LET ME DO THIS AGAIN I FEEL LIKE I'M GONNA SHIT MYSELF TO DEATH ARGHHHHHGHHG IS THIS WHAT DYSENTERY FEELS LIKE
He ran around the party with a broken foot/ankle with a gallon of Malibu yelling "it must rain coconut"
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I was pretty sure he wouldn't be into me after I fucked his brother, and then his best friend, and yet, here I am doing lines off his stomach
Randomize
