OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
I thought this guy walking back to the dorms with his black laundry bag was walking a black flamingo I'm not even kidding I had to take a break on a bench after that.
You're my favorite person
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
