Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
