in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
Also I would love to pregame at your place if I weren't stuck at mine drinking laxatives
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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