Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
