If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Yeah you fell over while you were peeing and you said "hold I'm, I'm still peeing"
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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