I was just like staring at the lawn boy while singing "You Belong With Me".
I am the king of creep.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Randomize
