There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
Have you come up with a team name for the beer pong tournament on Saturday?
We can be the stepdads. If anyone asks why say because we beat you and you hate us.
You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize
