you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I got to the apartment, I was handed a beer within 20 seconds, I'm glowing in the dark, there's fog everywhere, and now I'm wearing a sombrero because apparently it's silly hat night. I never want to leave.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
I can't wait to see you & have espresso-fueled sex
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