how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
An open call to all exes! i have a drunk text policy that requires i delete any and all texts after drink 3, however i have reason to believe i have done something stupid. if i have texted you that "I love you", "miss you" and/or conveyed any interest in getting back together with you in the last 24 hours i was belligerent and lying. That is all.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize