She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
I'm still drunk. I put on workout clothes this morning and just puked in my bathroom. That's the same as going to the gym, right?
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
Randomize
