I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
The underwear in the garbage is clean. Just wipe the pizza sauce off
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
My professor just said irregardless, get me out of here
I guess he's ir-illiterate
Randomize
