can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
Randomize
