You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Just realized ive been sitting through all of lab with a condom in my bra.
yay hump day
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize
