Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
