Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
It's sunday night and I just went to the store to buy cookie dough and condoms, I'm so proud of myself.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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