I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Randomize