Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
Ya I guess he's not a bad roommate. I mean if he wasn't here I would probably be more lazy and pee in bottles and stuff.
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
Ikeep having to ask jim if I'm actually talking. I canmt feel my body...this is what Christmas is all about
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
I just slammed another champagne, swaggered over to her, pointed across the room at the 20 y/o lacrosse player and whispered loudly, "I brought that one for YOU." I'm getting a raise.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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