fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
i need to put some appletini on your dick
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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