Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
Please, let me fuck your mom
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Is it inception if it feels like another uterus is going to burst out of my current uterus?
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
He’s exactly what I’m looking for: he’s got a broken heart, a working penis and a new boat!!!
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