just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
