It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I know this sounds fake but she's deep frying a bar of soap right now
Come fucking get her
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
