The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
you had "tips for anal sex" in your google search history this morning. how was your sunday night?
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I love 3rd shift and working at a hotel I just had a late night booty call while I was getting paid..could life get any better??
You've lost booty call privileges between the hours of 10pm and 8am.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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