oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I wish life was like the Sims. Right when you're pregnant the music would play and I would just know instead of agonizing for the next two weeks.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Come over, we're having a tea party. And by a tea party I mean we're drinking whiskey from tea cups.
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
