i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I just celebrated my ex boyfriends birthday by having more sex than he will today.
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
PANTIES FOUND
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