i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
I feel like everything I touch in this bar I'm gonna get hepatitis. my kinda joint
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
So I just realized I have three bananas, seven condoms, three lube packets, three tampons, and a shot glass in my bag but no pen #modelstudent
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
She is still drunk from the night before, sitting here eating KFC mashed potatoes and drinking Arbor Mist before Anatomy lab.
Randomize
