Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
How many tongue depressors should I need to steal from urgent care to make samurai armor?
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
I am never going on a blind date ever again. He drank way too much and kept telling me I had a nice boob. Like.. Singular. What's the other one? The ugly twin?
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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