obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Sorry this is the worst night of your life and that you're being a baby about it.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
