Your tits are I can't wait for
weak ass sauce last night. waste of time. you suck. ps. your boobs are fake
i don't plan on having that self control this summer
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
He rubbed my back afterwards. I forgot how to talk and I legitimately thought I was a cat for a few minutes.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Randomize
