Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
what do you mean i can't make cookies with a blow dryer? challenge accepted.
Have you considered murder?
Other than my credit score and this bowl of oatmeal, not really. It's very messy
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