Don't you send me to vm
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I just want you to know that I think it is hilarious and wonderful that 40s are now your alcohol of choice.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?
He drives a tundra! Of course I fucked him. Im just saying eventually im going to need help moving and he has a nice truck. Its like thank you for later on
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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