i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
He told me if he passed out to wake him by sitting on his face, and if he suffocated at least he would die happy. Found the one.
Hopefully they won't bring up last year's Christmas party. I kind of predicted my great aunt's death...
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Hi,\n\nYou left your underwear in my Uber. Thanks and bye.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
