I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
sex on the stairs. not our finest idea.
Woke up with a text saying "when I get to see them titties again lil ma??" With 8 beads around my neck & an empty bottle of vodka in my arms.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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