yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
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