Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
i feel like my tongue has its own mouth, and that mouth just bit its tongue and is clenching its teeth.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
