My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
I wish costco sold astroglide.
i wish my brain was less awake, and didn't try and picture what you were talking about.
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Randomize
