It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
Biggest lesson I have learned in college: Drink if you are happy. Drink more if you aren't.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Today one of my patients offered me pot brownies. Medical school worth it. Living the dream.
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Randomize