She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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