so explain again why im purple
no
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I just realized that the first thing he ever bought me was Plan B.
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
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