yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
We're going to shave my junk and take pictures of it wearing fake mustaches we found at the dollar store. They're uncannily realistic; much better than the cockstaches of my youth.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Come make me food. I feel like if I go in the kitchen I will just get Gin.. and pass out in there.
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
How high?! We watched paid programming for 45 minutes before we realized it wasn't just a long commercial. So pretty high. The Bionic fish finder looks promising, though.
Lets get a boat first.
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
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