did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I was fine until "Under Pressure" came on the radio. It's like God wanted me to shit my pants on the drive home.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
Im part way to drunk.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
I'm pretty sure i doubled the number of dicks I've ever touched, last night.
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
She calls him the walking dildo to his face. That relationship is already fucked up.
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