i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
We had sex on a dog bed..
It's 4am & this guy is asleep with his junk still inside me..really rethinking my life
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Randomize
