He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
To bright to open both eye. Get pizza and put in feeding tube so i can sleep more
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
Let's cut to the chase. What days are we sleeping together this week?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Randomize
