Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
Randomize
