oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
It's getting increasingly easier to use his emotional instability to my advantage. That's about all he has going for him right now.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
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