so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
What's worse having drunken sex with hot married man or breaking the diet one week in?
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
Randomize
