dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
They said "my eyes made me look intoxicated" ......we harassed them all night and we called the cops and told them that the bouncer that kicked us out was selling meth in the club ...and then we went to wendys
I just read the lonely terrorist on nwa had 40 more friends than me on facebook
I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
He called himself excalibur. Thats all I remember.
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
I'm just wondering how Jon managed to get vomit ON THE CEILING?
Randomize
