CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
