I'm not looking forward to the waking up early part. Or actually the wedding part. Or the reception part. But I am looking forward to the meaningless sex with some random guy I meet at the reception part.
God is so good, I would give him a blow job right now.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
A good ear swabbing is more orgasmic than sex with him
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
