I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
